For the Love of Marriage

Girls and women all over dream of finding Prince Charming and living happily ever after.  We dream of the big, white weddings and all the focus on how beautiful we look on that day.  We look at it as our day.  Television shows, movies, and books always have to throw at least one "romantic" moment in there, if it isn't focused on love completely.  This just enforces our desires to have a man in our life to always love us and make us happy, but some girls become too focused on this one desire.  They plan their wedding in advance with no man.  They imagine themselves ten years down the road with kids playing in the backyard with their husband, but they yet to have even a fiance.  How is this healthy?  Especially when it leads to the woman becoming desperate once she hits the mid-twenties and there is no man in her life, so she takes the first man that shows the slightest bit of interest even if he is a jerk and does not deserve someone as wonderful and beautiful as the woman who just wants to find happiness with a man.  The woman settles.  Then instead of living happily ever after, it becomes living miserably ever after because she feels that there is no man who will love her.  As women, we feel the need to be loved, and we want a man to love us and dote on us.  However, the fact of the matter is that some of us are meant for celibacy while others find the love of their lives at 62 years old while others meet that special someone in middle school.  We do not know what God has planned for us, but I can tell you that because of the emphasis our culture puts on relationships, women and men settle for just anyone and do not think through the decisions they are making.  For example, my mother has a friend who was just married last April.  She is in her late thirties and felt her biological clock ticking.  She met a man who had already been married twice and divorced for different reasons, but she still gave him a chance.  It was soon realized that he was mean and cruel to my mom's friend emotionally.  Yet the woman would not end things because she believed no other men would come around to love her.  My mom's friend was scared of being alone for the rest of her life.  She wanted to grow old with someone, which is completely understandable, so she settled.  But sometimes it pays to be patient instead of rushing into a bad marriage like so many women do these days.  So when Wilde mocked marriage in The Importance of being Earnest, I really enjoyed it.  Yes, he was writing for a different time period where marriage was based on financial gain and social status, but the people of today need to step back and look at how much importance we have put on marriage.  I believe marrige is important, but it is not important enough for someone to give up their own happiness and dreams.  The people of that time were not marrying for love, and the people of today, in some cases, are just marrying to be married.  It should not be like that.  In the play, the characters were more focused on marrying someone based on their name and not about what kind of person their "love" interest was on the inside.  Today, people jump into relationships because of how someone appears, whether it is physically or socially, instead of whether he or she is caring, kind, trustworthy, and respectful.  And these relationships can occasionally turn into a quick proposal and marriage before the two people really get to know each other.  In this way, The Importance of Being Earnest can relate to our culture today.

Christianity in The Power Of One

In The Power of One, Christianity was a big aspect, and it was shown as a negative thing.  Peekay's mom had become a devout Christian while he was off at school.  When he came home, she was portrayed as an arrogant, controlling, and judgemental woman because of her faith.  She was constantly trying to convert Peekay and his grandfather to Christianity.  Every time they did something that she disapproved of, she would say that if they just gave their life to their Lord, they would be forgiven and could go to Heaven with her one day.  But some of those things that she disapproved of were boxing and going out with Doc, and those are not necessarily bad things in God's eyes.  So she was an extreme that made Christianity look distasteful, and this offended me.  However, I do understand that people have different views of different religions.  I also understand that some Christians do come off as holier-than-thou and judgemental of everyone who does not share their views.  Plus, the extremes are meant to make a point, occasionally offend, and get a reaction.  If it had been something like Courtenay making football or playing an instrument look like an awful idea, I could understand others in our class being offended at that as well.  So I can see Courtnay's reasoning for making Peekay's mother an extreme.  There was a comment that a student made in my class that I disagree with though.  The student said that following a religion is okay as long as it doesn't overtake your life, but the point of being a Christian is giving your whole life over to God.  In Matthew 13, there is a parable about a trader who was looking for fine pearls.  One day, he found the most valuable of all pearls.  He went out and sold everything that he had just so he could have this one pearl.  That is supposed to show that when we have this beautiful treasure of our Lord saving us, we should be doing all we can for Him even if it means giving up everything else.  So if someone really claims to be a Christian, their life should reflect that in giving their all for God.  And can't school work be that something that overtakes your life and therefore, in this students view, be a bad thing?  If you let your life revolve around getting the absolute best grades in class and spending all your time doing school work, you are going to miss out on friendships and relationships and all the other beautiful and wonderful things God created us for.  Plus, once someone does actually beat you with a grade in class or being number one over you in class ranking, what do you have then?  Whereas God is always there, and you don't have to compete with anyone to have one because He loves us all.  In my life, I would say that this comment by the student really affected me.  It made me sad to think that this student has a view of Christianity that shouldn't be that way.  Christians are supposed to be loving, caring, and encouraging.  We were created to glorify Him by loving those around us, and it makes me sad that this student has obviously not experienced someone who has let God "overtake" their life.  I want to be that person.  I want to show him that letting God consume you is admirable, beautiful, and worth it.  That there is a joy in your life even when things around you seem awful, and you feel like your drowning.  That joy is there because you always have your Father with you, and I want to show him that joy even on my worst days.